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An ACCURATE and RELIABLE simulation of the WONDERFUL WINDOWS 95 MS-DOS PROMPT.... Yeah, right!
Type it in, and remember to press SHIFT-ALPHA before typing all your favourite DOS commands.

A Listing in the hand is worth two in the bush

"MS-DOS PROMPT"
Lbl 1
Int (Ran#×4) -> Z
"A:>"? -> A
A=DIR => "VOL IN DRV A HAS NO LABEL NO FILE FOUND0 BYTES IN 0 FILES"
A=VER => A/
A=VER => Goto 1
A=DIR => Goto 1
Z=0 => "NOT ENOUGH EMS MEMORY"
Z=1 => "INCORRECT DOSVERSION"
Z=2 => "REQUIRES MS WINDOWS"
Z=3 => "BAD COMMAND OR FILE NAME"
Int (Ran#×4)=0 => Goto 2
Goto 1
Lbl 2
"THIS PROGRAM HAS PERFORMEDAN ILLEGAL OPERATION ANDWILL BE SHUT DOWN

Note: The missing speech mark on the last line is intentional, as it makes the calculator 'crash'. Originally, it was missed off (as was most of that message) due to lack of memory.